Waiting

I need you now
Or not at all
I’m waiting as patiently as I can
But I’m not sure I can hold on much longer
If you don’t reach out soon
I’ll just let go.

You probably have no clue how I’m feeling
How I have been feeling, for far too long
I wish things were either how they were before, or over.
I can’t just sit imbetween like this

Can’t you see what’s happening?
Or are you too happy in your little bubble
That you think everything is okay
I want you to be happy,
I don’t want to burst you,
But I don’t think its fair for me to carry this burden alone.
It’s not all about you and your life, you now
I’m doing things too
And this certainly isn’t helping things for me right now
It seems like so long, but it’s been just over a week
I guess being miserable for that long
Is worth the happiness I experienced the past couple months
But a week is a long time
When this is all you feel, but there’s so much else to do.

I bring my computer to school
And just sit writing these stupid poems
How many hours have passed now?
I haven’t even done anything
Little things perk up my mood
But they don’t last all that long
I’m sitting in this little cubicle,
Afraid to leave
I need some contact,
But don’t want to see anyone.
I don’t think I’ve had a real conversation all day.
This is an area for professional research
I’m supposed to be doing something useful here
I feel like I’m tainting it with my overemotional resonance
People here are dressed in suits
I’m hiding in my cubicle
I don’t really belong here
But I’m not sure where I belong
I forgot that I’m not at home
I’m in a quiet corner of a large busy space
I don’t know where else to go though
I guess I’ll just keep waiting.
It’s been too long though,
You’ve hurt me so much
That I’m not sure if I even want what I’m waiting for anymore
Maybe I should just give up all together,
Pick up and move on.